First, Figure Out If You Are The Problem

Seriously, you might be. Some of us who tend to want to escape responsibility need to hear that. 

On the other hand there are some of us martyr types out there that think EVERYTHING is our fault. Pro tip: it’s not. 

When you’re the problem it hurts. Guilt, shame, regret, disappointment are just some of the hurtful feelings we’ll inevitably have when it’s on us. The good news is when we’re the problem we also have the power to make it right with others and with ourselves. 

When we martyr up and take on problems that really aren’t ours Futility, frustration and even depression will follow when we taking false responsibility for someone else’s problem. It’s because we’re powerless over them. 

If you can’t tell whether the problems in your relationship or yours, theirs, or co-created then there’s your work.